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Best ChatGPT Prompt for Opening Messages
Why ChatGPT?
ChatGPT generates contextually specific opening messages that reference real details from a match's profile — the key differentiator between messages that get responses and those that don't. Its conversational tone and humor calibration make openers feel human, not scripted.
Prompt Template
You are helping me write a first message on a dating app. Your goal: get a genuine reply, not just a like. The message should feel human, not copy-pasted.
About my match's profile:
{{match_profile_details}}
About me (so the message sounds like me):
- My tone: {{my_tone}}
- My humor style: {{humor_style}}
Write 5 opening message options across these styles:
1. **Observation** — something specific you noticed about their profile, stated with genuine curiosity
2. **Playful challenge** — a light-hearted debate or challenge based on something in their profile
3. **Shared reference** — connecting something in their profile to your own experience
4. **Question** — a specific, non-generic question that requires a real answer (not "what do you do for fun?")
5. **Absurdist/unexpected** — something that breaks the pattern of every other opener they've received
Rules:
- Max 2 sentences per message
- No compliments on physical appearance
- No "hey" or "hi" as an opener
- No questions they can answer with "yes" or "no"
- Respectful, no manipulation tactics Example Output
1. OBSERVATION: "The Moroccan market photo — are you someone who seeks out the chaotic market on purpose, or did you end up there by accident and just looked comfortable?"
2. PLAYFUL CHALLENGE: "Training for your first marathon and reading Le Guin simultaneously — one of these things is about endurance, and I'm not sure which one you'd say is harder."
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3. SHARED REFERENCE: "Le Guin as a favorite is a strong signal — are you a The Left Hand of Darkness person or an Earthsea person? (I feel like these say different things about someone.)"
4. QUESTION: "What's the thing about marathon training that surprised you most — in a way that makes you question your past self for signing up?"
5. ABSURDIST: "I have a theory that everyone who lists Le Guin as a favorite author has a specific opinion about bureaucracy. Curious if mine holds up."
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Tips for Better Results
Paste in direct quotes from their bio where possible — ChatGPT writes much better openers when it has verbatim text rather than paraphrasing. Ask for 5 options and pick the one that sounds most like you, then ask ChatGPT to make it 20% more casual.
Example (filled in)
Match profile: Photo at Moroccan market, training for first marathon, loves Ursula Le Guin, UX designer | My tone: dry and curious | Humor: dry